Single and fabulous…exclamation point! If you’re a fan of Sex and the City then you’re familiar with the reference, and honestly, that’s exactly how I feel!
I was recently asked how I managed to be single and happy (I’m paraphrasing and they also didn’t mean it in a mean way), and truth be told, I’m someone that’s genuinely happy most of the time and I happen to be single. Does it get boring sometimes? Hell fucking yes, lol, but if I allowed my singleness to stop me from having experiences, that would be even sadder for me, ya know?
Dating is interesting, especially the older you get. As you continue to grow and gain life experiences under your belt (marriage, divorce, death, kids, career changes), it loses the ease that filled your youth. You learn that people have baggage, and that some may not want to be without it or change. We all can become very stuck in our ways to varying degrees, but hopefully, you’re not looking for perfection, but looking for some that can make sense in your world and vice versa.
Which brings me to where I am right now. My life is good. Like, really, really good. I have an amazing social life thanks to both my friends and this blog, my career is thriving, my family is healthy, and I’m secure in who I am as a woman. Personal development has been an ongoing process since I was a teen, so I know and love who I am, flaws and all. That also means that I’m content with being single. After so many dead-in relationships, I made peace with it, not because I want to stay that way, but because I’d rather have peace than distress. I KNOW how I want and deserve to be treated, and how I desire to FEEL in a relationship (secure, loved and appreciated), so if it’s a situation that’s not headed towards that, I’m good.
Now, that’s not to say every date has to lead to this (dating is fun and how you get to know people), but there comes a time in your life when you know early what could potentially happen with a person and you cut out all of the BS. That’s where I am now. I enjoy my alone time and time with friends and family waaaaaay too much to ever settle for kibbles and bits from. man ever again, so, if it’s not going to be a fun time in some capacity, I’ll pass. Ha!
I say all of this to say: singledom doesn’t have to be a death sentence or sad even. If you find yourself in that boat, use that time to get to know yourself on the deepest level possible, but also, use that time to enjoy TF out of your life. Exclamation point!!!!
Happy Valentine’s Day!
